A lot of good and interesting information in class this past week. We talked about newly-weds and the transitions they go through the first month of marriage, first year, and when children start coming into the family.

Of course when you get married there is going to be a lot of changes taking place. Which include not just marrying the person and for the wife to change her last name. Other examples would be making decisions together as now a unified partnership, finances stuff, medical stuff, extended family stuff, lots of stuff. And the list goes on. It is a lot of change, but change is good, change helps people to grow.

The biggest change is would most likely have to be when the first child comes along though. Reports have shown that when children are born marriage satisfaction between the husband and wife decreases. At first I didn’t understand how that could be. I always thought that a baby was a big bundle of joy, which it is, along with all the crying and diaper changing. But after our discussion and thinking about it I realized that it is possible for marriage satisfaction to decrease with the birth of a child. First of all, it is no longer just the two of you. You have just added a whole new individual to your family of two, which means very little alone time for the two of you for a while. When that baby comes along the mother often times spends all, or at least, most of her time with the baby, which can cause the husband and father to feel disconnected from the family and like he isn't needed. Also the fact that the baby tends to keep parents up at night making the parents more tired; everyone knows when you are tired you aren't very tolerable of things, which can lead to frequent arguments, etc. which often cause tension in your relationship with one another. The main thing I would say that can be the biggest problem is just the fact of not being able to spend as much time together, or even just feeling like you can't. But just because research says marital satisfaction decreases when children are born doesn't mean it has to be true for everyone. We all have the power and ability to choose how we will react to certain situations. It may be a bit more work when children come along to keep your marriage strong and increasing, but it is possible. Involve each other in all the aspects of raising your child, communicate with each other, and love each other unconditionally and your marital satisfaction will thrive with the additions to your families. 

Marriage is a huge step in everyone life. It is beautiful. There are many, many challenges along the way. But through those challenges if you work together your love for each other will grow and you will have a happy and successful marriage. Along with the challenges there are of course those wonderful moments of joy that we are blessed with. Children of our every own, our best friend always there, what more could someone ask for?